90s TV...Revisited

First of all, I'd like to give a shout out to one of my very best and oldest friends, Jamie Linenberg.

Today is her birthday! We have been best friends for almost ten years, and she is a very important part of my life. I'm so excited to be able to be in the same city with her this summer- we haven't been in the same city for an extended period of time since high school!

Now, onto my thoughts that you have been waiting days for. So last night I was laying in bed, unable to fall asleep (probably due to the fact that I slept til 12 and was in bed by 11..therefore being awake for less than 12 hours,) and I started thinking about the shows of our youth. But let's revisit them...because if I were to see these on TV now, I think I'd view them a little differently For example:

1) Full House

I don't know anyone that didn't love this show. But lets be serious for a second. It is about a family, headed by three, single men...in SAN FRANCISCO. Gay, gay, gay. You know if this family were real, every single person that met them thought Danny and Joey and Uncle Jesse were on the down low. At the very least, Danny and Joey. Uncle Jesse had Becky after the first season or two. But Danny and Joey? Joey NEVER dated anyone. And Danny used Vicki as his beard for a bit. One episode they even dressed in DRAG for their college reunion (allegedly to spy on their rival sorority.) Nice try boys. You live in San Francisco. Feel free to show who you truly are.

2.)Saved By The Bell

I don't know about you, but I grew up assuming this was what high school was like. You were BFF with your principal, and you could segregate and label students into their cliques pretty easily. (Jocks always wore their wrestling jerseys to class, nerds ALWAYS had glasses and suspenders, and the pretty girls were cheerleaders.) And you always had a token black girl in your group. (Yay me!) But lets think about this for a second. Zack Morris, aka Preppy, the stud, the trouble maker. Always in and out of the principal's office. Somehow, I feel like in real life, Zack would never be in the principals office as much as he was. He did things like run money schemes and look up girls skirts. He went to a PUBLIC high school in SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA. Im gonna assume the kids in the principals office in a public school in SoCal are doing a little more than profiting off Screech's Grandma's Spaghetti Sauce. (The sauce you can have, but the secret? She's a mine!) They're probably smoking all kinds of illegal drugs, and being part of the Crips and Bloods. Zack would have never made it through the door.

PS- Best line of that whole show- Jessie when she's popping speed to study- "I'm so excited! I'm so excited! I'm so....SCARED!"

3.)Doug

Now Doug was one of Kristof and I's all time favorite shows. We always got hype because it was set in Bluffington, which we equated with Bloomington (Whats up IU!) Thinking about it now, Skeeter was totally the token black friend. And he used to honk his nose and go "Skeet Skeet!" Which was all too innocent then. But rap music has now made that a tad inappropriate. Doug was wagon because he always made it through his ethical and moral dilemmas by writing in his journal, and with the help of his altar ego Quail man. But how about Roger Klotz? Sorry to say it, but he was totally white trash. He actually lived in a trailer park. He rolled around in his leather jacket and bullied everyone. Not to mention he used a cat as his sidekick. A CAT. Sick. Roger was so beat.

Mr. Dink was totally the next door neighbor who was stoned all the time. He never made any sense. And Doug's sister, Judy. Also a future pothead who thought she was so smart and artistic. And Beebee. She was rich and spoiled and the Paris Hilton of Bluffington. I actually have this show on DVD I got it for Christmas a few years ago. So great.

4.)Rugrats

I loved this show. I actually don't have much to say about Rugrats except for Angelica was SUCH a bitch. Like she sucked. And Phil and Lil's mom might actually have been a lesbian. Did you notice she always repped the womens symbol on every article of clothing? And her hair was always cut super short. And she was always in a hurry to go to a racquetball game. And she totally emasculated her husband every chance she got. Just saying.

5.) Home Improvement

First thing I think of when I think of Home Improvement is JTT. The second thing I think of is how every single episode, Tim the Tool Man Taylor was causing major damage blowing something up. Now I have been in law school long enough to know that there's no way this man could make a profit off of that show because he would be up to his ears in legal damages and liability. And he was so mean to Al. That always annoyed me.

Also, Wilson. Wilson was so sketch. Why do you never show your face? And why are you always up in the Taylor's business? You just happen to be outside overhearing every single thing thats going on in their household. I mean if I were the Taylors I'd tell Wilson to get up out my face. And show yours. For once. He also was always giving wise words of advice to every member of the Taylor family. He was like their next door neighbor version of a Buddha.

6. The Baby Sitters Club

Last but not least, the Baby Sitters Club. This wasn't so much a TV show as it was a couple random VHS's and a movie released based on the books, but they were such a big part of my life they deserve a shout out. I actually was part of the BSC book club and got three books in the mail a month. I loved it. But lets take a look at how the characters would turn out in real life in my opinion.

Kristy- She was a tomboy. She loved softball and she may have batted for both teams. I mean both Alan Gray AND Bart from Barts Bashers liked her but she never really did anything about it. Just continued wearing her jeans and a sweatshirt and having "great" ideas. I think Kristy would have moved on from her BSC friends in high school, played varsity softball, and maybe ended up playing in college for like a DII or DIII school. She probably coaches at a high school now.

Mary Ann- Mary Ann always annoyed me because she was SO shy. I didn't really have room to talk back then because believe it or not I used to be SUPER shy. But Mary Ann took it to the extremes. I mean everytime Cokie Mason even looked at her funny she would cry. Like reel it in Mary Ann. I also like how she dated Logan Bruno, who was considered a "southern hottie." He was from KENTUCKY. And his accent wasn't southern it was redneck.

Stacey- She was so annoying. She mentioned in every single breath she took that she was from New York City. We get it Stacey. You're a "city girl". The only thing that made her tolerable was I felt bad for her because she could never eat chocolate or anything good because of her diabetes. Stacey definitely ditched her BSC friends in high school, was super popular, became a total sorang at college and joined a sorority. Then probably got Lavalier'd by some frat boy. And lived a life in the suburbs always complaining about how much she misses NYC. She also is definitely the type who will also get plastic surgery in her future.

Claudia- Claudia was actually really dumb. Like she couldn't spell if her life depended on it. She probably just ended up mooching off her smart sister for the rest of her life and eating her stashed candy. In real life I guarantee you she would have ended up living in Soho, portraying the life of a struggling artist, with her sister Janine who probably would be a professor at Columbia.

Dawn- Dawn was really annoying sometimes because she was so Save the Earth before it was cool to do so. She definitely drives a hybrid now. She probably moved back to California for college, went to Berkeley, smoked all day everyday, and participated in numerous protests against bad treatment of animals and things of that sort. She's definitely a vegetarian if not even a vegan.

Mallory- I feel bad for Mallory. Her famliy was actually the Duggars. They had like 19 kids. And she was so unfortunate looking. Red hair, freckles, glasses, braces. Life did not treat her right. However she did wheel that Australian boyfriend when he moved in across the street from her. She always wanted to be a writer- I could see her more as a journalist. Maybe writing for the Wall Street Journal or something.

Jesse- Jesse was one of my favorites and not just because she was the only black one. She was like actually normal. She was really good at ballet and had that pen pal boyfriend Quint. She probably ended up going to Juliard or some school for the performing arts.

ALRIGHT ALL..hope you enjoyed my take on the 90s. Oh, last week I forgot to do Mimi's recommendations so here they are:

1.)Justin Bieber's album My World 2.0. Probably the only time I've been obsessed with a guy in a non sexual way since Michael Jackson. I love his music. If you like pop, buy it. For reals.

2.)GLEE. If you don't watch this show, you should. It's super funny and makes you feel happy.

3.)Sammys Hill and Sammys House by Kristin Gore, Al Gore's daughter. They're kind of a chick flick type, but they're hilarious and real at the same time. Two of my favorite books made.

I probably wont be posting for 2 weeks becuase finals are upon us, and in law school your only grade for the entire semester is the exam. And I have 5. So, my life will not be so fun for the next two weeks. I hope this will last you until I return.

Peace, Love and Leo

xoxo MIMI